It’s hard to believe that Ryan and I are leaving for Rwanda in exactly two weeks! Life has been so busy lately that we have barely had time to think about this trip. Planning and preparing for Spring FX has taken up so much of my time and mental capacity over the past few weeks, and in that sense, it is a relief to finally have it behind me. Now I can actually refocus a little bit and start getting ready to travel!
Visas, flights, vaccinations, up-to-date travel documents, and packing! There is so much to think about! And not to mention the fact that we will have to somehow manage to get ahead at work so that we can disappear for three weeks!
And then… there’s the anxiety. Yeah, that. It’s true that I have made some amazing progress over the past few months in regards to learning how to deal with my anxiety through the ins and outs of my daily life. But let’s face it. There is nothing about travelling to Rwanda that resembles my daily life. The flights, the jetlag, the health risks, the cultural differences… all of these are “out of the ordinary” factors that will affect my anxiety levels, and I need to be prepared for that.
Today I spent a large portion of my day mulling over what type of antimalarial medication I should choose. I have travelled to nine different African nations in my lifetime, spread out across three separate trips totalling a span of around three months. In that time, I have managed to avoid ever contracting malaria, and I would like to keep it that way (though Ryan has not been quite as lucky)!
Unfortunately, for those of us who have battled mental illness, there are some implications to consider when it comes to choosing the right antimalarial drugs. While I have never really given this much consideration in the past, it has been one of the factors (among others) at the forefront of my mind lately as I make this decision. I do not want to take anything that could slow down my progress or produce symptoms like depression, anxiety, or paranoia… because seriously… I am quite capable of producing those symptoms on my own and I don’t need any extra help!
Anyway, we are working with a really wonderful travel health nurse and I think we pretty much have all of this sorted out, so the point of this rant is not to concern anyone (I’m talking to you, mom). Instead, all I’m trying to do here is point out the factors that have been causing some stress for me lately, so that I can now take a moment to remind myself that it’s all good.
And it is. It is all good. It’s going to be all good. I needn’t let irrational fear consume me when it comes to any aspect of the upcoming trip (including my snake phobia!!!). Because at the end of the day, I believe that my life—and I mean every part of it—is in God’s hands.
Proverbs 19:21 says, “A person may have many plans in their heart. But the Lord’s purpose wins out in the end.” So certainly, I should be cautious and prudent when planning and preparing for this trip, or any endeavor that I embark on in life. But at the end of the day, I need to remember that it is God’s plans, over mine, that will prevail in the end.
Knowing this gives me such a soft and gentle sense of peace in my heart. It puts my mind at ease and gives me the strength I need to believe, once again, that I can do this. I can conquer this trip! And whatever happens, I can rest assured knowing that my loving God has my back.
Do you experience trip anxiety? What helps you get through it?
every time. Not so much traveling by myself. But I am anxious when traveling with family.
I feel I have to take care of them in all circumstances… Cost me way too much!! I think my paranoia and panic cost me my marriage to some degree… its a bad bet to give in to anxiety as we well know. I hope to be braver. Be more liberated. somehow, someday,
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I completely relate to needing to feel in control of taking care of everyone on the trip! It is a heavy weight to carry for sure. Wishing you luck as you work on this and pursue the liberation you seek!
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what you guys doing in rwanda? i am curious
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We are visiting some missionary friends that we have there. We’ll be staying with them for about 2.5 weeks and just hanging out and helping them out with anything they need!
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Hope your travel plans go well and enjoy your vacation! ❤
While I don't travel much (or too far), I understand the need to make sure everything goes right, not to mention the mountain of work to finish before going off! I like a quiet vacation so my husband and I usually travel somewhere nearby (like 150km kind of nearby 😛 ). Once in a while it's fun to travel with the rest of the family, but sometimes it gets too exciting for my little introvert mind and I need another vacation to recover from it. 😛
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I definitely know what you need about needing a vacation to recover from a vacation!! But at the same time I have a feeling that we will come back from this trip with really full hearts ❤
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Enjoy your trip – wishing you a safe journey 😊
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Thank you so much!
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Ah Talasi,
I plan at least a month in advance or else I freak out big time – I have been known to be all packed 2 months in advance with all in place like visa etc etc. And then the mental preparation too take at least a month like when I was going to the US. But I have recently also started to address this and even be prepared to let go if I miss out on the trip for whatever reason. All the best for the trip then.
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Well… I have never packed 2 months in advance, but I totally understand that need for mental preparation!
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Good luck with your trip…I know it will be wonderful for you! My husband and I are going on our first trip since our kids grew up and moved out, to Florida to see family. I have apprehension about the flight and not sure if I’ll request anxiety medication from my doctor. I’m going to put it in Gods hands and be strong throughout…and I hope you do too! 💜
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Thanks so much! Yes, God has been challenging me to just trust Him with everything, and that is what I am trying to do!!
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I wear an interactive medic ID (RoadID.com) in hopes that they would actually look up the info. I have several things listed as allergies that cause mania but if I travel to another country, yikes. However, my mental illness is second fiddle to chronic pain. I pretty much can’t fly anywhere despite absolutely loving planes, because sitting any length of time will causes days of pain. Just not worth it. It’s why, when I travel across the country to see my dad, I drive. Even though that seems way worse, I can in fact get out every couple of hours, walk around, stretch and so forth.
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Yes, in that sense driving would be a much better option for you. So sorry to hear that your chronic pain gives you so much trouble!
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Could u check out my blog and let me know if I’m doing it right or ???
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